I’ve been going through my old blog writing for two days and I’ve barely scratched the surface. Man, I wrote a lot of crap. But I have been able to pull aside a few things so far that I like enough to repost here – maybe, updated, edited and erased of all the drunken grammatical errors.
originally posted: 2002 (has been updated/refreshed)
Things I Have Learned
- There are two kinds of people: those who will tell you to make lemonade out of life’s lemons, and those who know you hate lemonade.
- life will never ever imitate your favorite tv show
- having one good friend is always better than having 20 so-so acquaintances
- no matter how many drugs you are given, childbirth will still hurt like a bastard
- special edition of anything is usually not very special
- a band’s third cd is usually the worst
- don’t fall asleep with the history channel on
- there is no such thing as a permanent record
- things like “heartache” and “lump in the throat” are not just sayings, they are real physical inflictions.
- your parents were right. so was yoda.
- never trust a guy who says “there is nothing in this joint besides pot”
- never apologize for being who you are. unless you are a serial killer.
- if you want to be the kind of person that spreads gossip, be prepared to be the kind of person who is the subject of gossip
- don’t go in the basement when there is a homicidal maniac on the loose
- lower your expectations, and you are never disappointed
- you get what you tolerate
- unconditional love is a gift. never take it for granted
- the rock stars you idolized when growing up will eventually become old and bitter and you will be embarrassed to tell anyone that you once wrote them a fan letter and sealed it with a kiss
- stuffed animals do not come alive after you are asleep
- sometimes it’s ok to be selfish
- if you have doubt about something, trust your feelings
- there is no shame in buying guide books for video games
- people only change if they want to, not because you want them to
- don’t sweat the small stuff
- it’s all small stuff
What you have learned?