It’s almost Halloween and my thoughts turn to candy. I don’t eat a whole lot of candy, but something about this time of year makes my cravings for chocolately goodness kick in. It’s too bad my kids don’t go trick or treating anymore. I used to steal the good stuff out of their bag. Leave them with the crap like pennies and MaryJanes and McDonald’s coupons. Hey, I’m just trying to save on dental bills!
So what do you look for in the bag? What’s your all time, absolute favorite candy? Mine:
Reeses Peanut Butter Cups
See, I’m not a huge chocolate fan. I like it, but not enough to eat a whole bar of just chocolate. I need to have it mixed with something. It’s like drinking. Rum is ok, but I wouldn’t drink it straight. It needs a mixer. It needs Coke. So I think of peanut butter as chocolate’s mixer.
Damn, I love me some peanut butter. I’ll eat it right out of the jar with a spoon. Sometimes I forego the spoon entirely and just stick my finger in the jar and grab a scoop of peanut butter. Lick it right off my finger. Yes, that’s me in the picture. Good stuff. Now take that peanut butter and wrap it in chocolate and you have a gift from god that should be holier than communion wafers. I believe it’s a gift from god for one reason. It cures PMS. The saltiness of the peanut butter plus the chocolate is better than 40 Midols and an orgasm sometimes. Just biting into one a Reesesm feeling the smoothness of the peanut butter on my tongue, the sweetness of the chocolate in my throat, the tantalizing taste of both of them swirling around my mouth to make the most pleasurable aural experience since my birthday.
On the flipside, there’s always that candy that you come across that makes you want to hold up a cross and a jar of holy water and scream for your priest to come perform an exorcism. Or maybe that’s just me. I don’t know about you, but I’m pretty sure that coconut is born of the devil. It is Satan’s plaything.
Mounds.
Evil sidekick to Almond Joy. Purveyor of all that is evil in the world of candy. Harborer of the dreaded coconut flakes. Now, I should tell you – I can eat a real coconut. Right out of the shell. That’s good stuff. But this flaked garbage? No bueno. I don’t know what happens to it between the shell and the cleaver, but I’m pretty sure it has something to do with Satan taking a piss on it. Plus, who the hell names their candy Mounds? Because all I can think of is, well…..sex. And I don’t want to confuse sex with coconuts. Although once I wore a coconut bra during a bachelorette party. While singing Sister Christian. But still, that has nothing to do with coconut covered candy.
The anti-christ is coming and he’s chewing on your Mounds.
I probably posted this before, but I’m talking about candy, so why not. My guess the candy collage.
click for bigger.
I’m going to go have some peanut butter cups for dinner.
With you on the Reese’s and the peanut butter (have you tried the Big Cups? LOVE), but my favorite candy bar is, uh, Mounds. Look, there just aren’t that many bars made with dark chocolate and I’ll pretty much eat coconut no matter what you do to it and–oh, enough of my excuses. I do agree with you that the name is horrible. MOUNDS. It brings to mind bad softcore/romance novels I thought I had long expunged from my memory.
I like Reese’s – especially good are the little ones they give out.
But my favorite candybar is a Score bar. I think – long ago – they had something else that was similar, and I loved those before Score bars came around. Yum.
Sadly, I knew like 37 of the 49 candies.
I think Reese’s are my favorite as well, but I, like kz, enjoy the Mounds as well.
And there are several candy items that carry a sexual connotation. Mounds is the worst, but there is also Sugar Daddy, Now & Later, Good & Plenty.
Maybe it’s just me, what with the dirty mind and all.
Or maybe it is the forbiddeness (is that a word?) of the sex and the candy (do you smell somthing?) that make our minds go there.
Just sayin’.
Since moving here, my joneses have tended to be for candy that isn’t typically available in metro Atlanta — Idaho Spud, for example, and I can understand why it’s rare hereabouts since it’s made by a little company based in (wait for it) Idaho.
Once I stumbled on a convenience store miles from home that had the Rocky Road bar but they ran out, and since then I either have to get it while traveling out west, or buy it online. And since, these days, it’s not a good idea for me to have large quantities of candy in the house due to a lack of will power, I really can’t do that anymore. (Doesn’t stop me eating candy, I just have to avoid buying a lot all at once.)
I also used to miss the Pearson Salted Nut Roll, which I like a lot more than Payday, but Walgreen’s — newly opened in my area — has ‘em, so I don’t feel like I have to stock up anymore.
For a casual convenience-store pickup, I like Milky Way Midnight or the new mint-flavor 3 Musketeers if they have ‘em.
Until you got to the part about Mounds- I like the mutant candy coconut but not so much the real thing- I was in full and total bobblehead agreement, right down to the part about sometimes swiping a big hunk of nothing but peanut butter out of the jar. I used to do complicated alchemical experiments late at night with ice cream sundaes, trying to figure out the ideal way to microwave peanut butter into a hot, pourable liquid to go alongside hot fudge. I got pretty far, but I melted a lot of jars of Skippy along the way.
I also will take a slice of bread, slather it thickly with peanut butter, put on some of the baby garlic dill pickles I like to snack on, then fold the entire mess up and eat it… but my friends and family seem to think that’s taking my fondness for peanut butter to a strange and deviant place. Oh well.
Mounds are the food of the Gods!
But seriously, cloyingly sweet candy just doesn’t move me anymore.
Oh, but the smartees.
All day long with the smartees.
I LOVE Smarties but only buy about one bag of them a year.
I like Mounds, but don’t eat them all that often. I’ve got to be not hungry, but craving something to eat a Mounds.
Love the peanut butter cup…I can remember when you could buy one for a nickel and two for a dime. And I’m only a year older than ‘chele.
On any given day, when I’m hungry and raiding the machines at work, I’ll go for a Snickers. ‘Cuz when your hunger is pokin’ atcha pokin’ atcha, it satisfies.
My all time favorite though is the Cadbury Fruit and Nut bar. Cadbury chocolate is my favorite, whether it’s wrapped around caramel or just around some almonds and raisins.
I’ve never seen them given out for Hallowe’en, but my all-time favorite is Valomilk (Mallo cups are similar, but a much paler imitation).
Valomilks, for those not familiar, are like huge thick peanut butter cups – but with a very vanilla-y, liquid marshmallow center. Heaven. (And the chocolate they use is pretty good, too).
The only sad thing is that everywhere around here I’ve seen them for sale, they don’t keep a constant temperature, and the Valomilks either spring a leak (which means the marshmallow hardens up a little and isn’t as good) or they get that danged “bloom” on the chocolate.
I hate it when people mistreat candy.